A good friend of mine was over last night. We bought four 69 cent frozen pizzas; we ate two of them and watched Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade. Little did I know, he put another one of those 69 cent pizzas in the oven. My good friend fell asleep.

My brother comes home, and a little while later says, “What’s that… smell?” My sense of smell not being very good, I respond, “What smell?” Then he poses the question, “What’s in the oven…?” I turn my head around and look at him standing in the kitchen, hovering over the oven with the door open, “Oh, (name censored to protect the innocent) must have left the oven on. You can turn it off,” I replied. He chuckles, “There’s something in here, though…” Here’s what it was:

The pizza had probably been in the oven for about 3 hours.

The moral of this story? Don’t stay in the oven. If you’re in sin, get out… now! Seriously, do you want to look like that?!?!?!?